when i look at you

“Why…” Ayato mumbles to his breath, his head nuzzling to your neck upon sighing with exasperation.“Why won’t you look at me?”“Pardon?”“Look at me,” you feel a thread of desperation laced in his voice so soft that it might have threatened your senses, altering your resolve as you try to remain composed.“I am looking at you now, Ayato,”“No, you know that’s not what I meant,”“What, then?”“Why must you be so cruel? If only you could see how much I devote myself to this marriage. How I’m devoted to... to you…” —They say drunk thoughts are sober thoughts. Ayato, intoxicated by the alcohol from the earlier party, finally takes the courage to confess that to him, you are more than a political partner. To him, this marriage is more than an arranged proposal. Why can’t you see how fervently he attempts to make this marriage work? Why won't you ever look his way? When did the walls of your relationship become too steep to climb up? How did you two end up taking the longer, rockier road of your relationship?