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Summary
"Sorry to make this really awkward, but this catastrophic dork-crush pandemic swept through the population of Davesville years ago, dude. Started about the time you sent us our shades, and no-one’s found a cure yet, the disaster’s just gone on and on. Widows wailing in the streets, unmarried chicks wondering why there’s so much gay but so little hot man-on-man action: straight up doom and gloom all round."
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